Learning to Trust in the Middle of a Scooter Takeover!

My husband, Jim, and I love to travel.  We’ve been all over the world to many countries and adore it.  Not everyone likes to travel though.  I’ve had people tell me I was crazy for wanting to travel outside the US.  I realized that it does take a certain amount of trust though.  That led me down the rabbit hole of thinking about what trust really is and how many areas of our lives does trust play a part.

I thought I would tell you a story about our Southeast Asia trip.  Talk about trust!

There’s a certain type of traffic you only experience in Southeast Asia. Or at least of all the places I’ve traveled so far.  The kind that makes you question your basic survival instincts.

On our first full day in Hanoi, Jim and I stood at the edge of an intersection that had no traffic lights. We needed to get to the other side of the street though.  We were at an intersection and there was a crosswalk, but no traffic lights! We had been told to just walk out and start crossing.

Ha!  As if!   Scooters (a million of them), cars, bicycles and even busses zipped past in every direction, some carrying entire families, others balancing crates of vegetables or trays of eggs. I froze, unsure whether to laugh or run.  I thought about running, but instead, I laughed.

I smiled and turned to Jim and said, “How are we supposed to cross?”He grinned and shrugged. “You just… go.” Wait....What?

Apparently, the trick to crossing the street in Vietnam is to not wait for the traffic to stop.

It doesn’t. It’s always there.  Instead, you step out ….slowly, steadily, no sudden moves and trust this sea of scooters will flow around you like a school of fish parting for a rock.

It took me a couple minutes (and a boost of adrenaline), but we finally did it. Hearts pounding, we stepped out into traffic and crossed to the other side of the street… and something shifted in me.

I had trusted. Not blindly, but bravely. I still kept my eyes open and watched my surroundings, but I trusted.  We had also been told once we were off the curb, we shouldn’t slow down, stop or run.  Just keep a steady pace.  And that’s what we did.   It was like a dance that had been choreographed beautifully. 

Travel Teaches Trust, Whether You Like It or Not

When you travel internationally - especially to places where the culture, language, and rules are vastly different - trust becomes less of an abstract idea and more of a minute-by-minute practice.

You trust the street food won’t give you food poisoning.

You trust your tuk-tuk driver will take you where you asked even though he doesn’t speak English. You trust your instincts when a place feels off… and when it feels just right.

You trust that the unfamiliar can become something beautiful if you keep an open mind.

And sometimes you trust the universe—that it brought you there for a reason.

That street-crossing moment wasn’t just a funny travel story for me (although it is damn funny.) It was a metaphor. Because the truth is, trust has never come easy to me. Not the way it seems to for other people.

I grew up in a home where trust was a dangerous gamble. Where the people who were supposed to protect me were often the ones I needed protection from. In a world like that, trust becomes a luxury you can’t afford.

So, I became a girl who depended on no one. A young mother who carried the weight of the world on her shoulders. A woman who didn’t ask for help, because help had strings. Or judgment. Or silence where there should’ve been safety.

Until Trust Started Showing Up in Small, Surprising Ways

Like the way Jim gently nudges me forward on every trip, both literally and emotionally. To walk across a bridge that is very long and very high. To climb a mountain that looks way too high to climb. To zipline in Mexico (how do we know they are safe???)

Like the way that little Vietnamese woman selling bánh mì winked at me when I hesitated, as if to say, “You’ll be okay, honey.”  Or the egg coffee (I did not have this but Jim did.)

Like the way the world, over and over, has offered me people, places, and moments that slowly rewrote my definition of safety.

Trust isn’t about blind faith. It’s about building evidence that not everyone will let you down. That not every risk ends in heartbreak. That sometimes, stepping into the chaos gets you exactly where you’re supposed to go.

I’ve known so many women who, like me, built entire lives around self-protection. Women who are outwardly capable - smart, strong, busy - but inwardly exhausted from carrying it all alone.

Who hesitate to speak up because that can feel terrifying.

Sometimes trust starts by crossing a street in Vietnam.Sometimes it starts by saying yes to yourself.

If You’re Reading This and Feeling Stuck…

Ask yourself:

• Where have I stopped trusting life, others, or even myself?

• What would happen if I took one small, brave step forward—even if I didn’t know exactly what was on the other side?

The answers might surprise you. Because the world is still full of motorbikes that will part for you.

You just have to step off the curb.

In gratitude of all of my journeys,

Ruthie